Atlanta, GA
February 27, 2024
Several months ago, a friend succumbed to ALS. Yesterday, I learned that horrible disease has again hit close to home.
We last saw my cousin Moira about a decade ago, when she hosted us at her house in Boston. Her family couldn’t have been more welcoming.
We’d last seen Moira years earlier, at our grandmother’s funeral. At that time, we’d not been together since we were kids. But I immediately lamented what I’d been missing. She was beautiful, charming, intelligent, and kind. Our most recent visit reinforced those impressions.
If anything, it amplified them. She was a delight, and her family wonderful. After we left their house, we intended to be better about staying in touch. But time passed, life intervened, and our best intentions drifted away…as they often do in the scattered society in which we live.
To my regret, I haven’t seen Moira since. She and I occasionally emailed during subsequent years. But distance and our respective duties kept our paths from crossing again.
We’ve been fortunate to see her father on several occasions. He lived in DC, and was a gracious host during years we made regular visits to Washington.
We loved seeing our Uncle Joe. He and his wife couldn’t have been more hospitable. As a docent at the National Air & Space Museum, he took my flight-infatuated thirteen year-old son on an extensive tour he’d not forget.
Joe is an impressive guy. He’s a phenomenal photographer who shares his impressions as he travels the world, which he’s done extensively throughout his life.
Culminating in the rank of Colonel, his career spanned several decades in the Air Force, including combat and extreme altitude reconnaissance missions in Europe, the Arctic, South America and the Pacific.
He was Air Attaché to the U.S. Embassy in Thailand, and later personally represented the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff at embassies in Asia, Europe and South and Central America.
He was Senior US Military Representative to France, and Defense and Air Attaché to the American Embassy in Paris.
After his Air Force service, Joe joined the National Academy of Sciences and National Research Council, where he spent more than a decade managing and directing military, science, and aviation programs for several government agencies.
During his career Joe earned a slew of awards, including (among many others) the Legion of Merit, the Medal of Hai Chi in China, and the Royal Order of the White Elephant from Thailand.
He received le Medaille de Paris, and the President of France bestowed on Joe the Ordre de Merit.
By all accounts, my uncle has been amply (and justifiably) rewarded for exceptional work throughout his distinguished career. But he’d trade every honor and accolade to save his daughter.
Her ailment isn’t kind. There’s no known cause or cure for amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, a neurodegenerative disease that progressively debilitates motor neurons that message the muscles needed to move, speak, eat and breathe.
Apparently, Moira received her diagnosis almost a year ago. I was devastated when I learned of it last night. I’m still in shock. I can’t fathom my lovely cousin enduring this awful affliction.
But she’s doubtless doing so with dignity and grace. Why wouldn’t she? That’s how she does everything, with poise and character no ailment can abate.
Moira may be resigned to her situation, but she isn’t reconciled to it. A professional architect, she’s doubtless developed a blueprint to fight this formidable foe.
Fortunately, she has help. Her immediate family, including her selfless sister, have been indispensable blessings. Not that there’s much I can do, but my assistance is available whenever she wants it.
Whether she requests it or not, there’s one thing from me she will always receive.
When horrible things happen, it’s easy to second guess the ways of God. But that’s pointless and impossible. As the Monsignor at our church once put it, “God wouldn’t be God if He were God the way we would be God if we were God.”
Like a spray of foam trying to assess the sea, we can’t know why God does what He does. All we can do trust His guidance and beseech His blessings.
It’s popular to belittle “thoughts and prayers.” But only among people who haven’t experienced their power.
The grandmother at whose funeral Moira and I became reacquainted thirty years ago certainly did. She went to Mass religiously, every day. To her, prayer was essential, not incidental; a steering wheel, not a spare tire.
Our grandmother didn’t pray only when needed. Prayer was always needed. And now her granddaughter needs it more than ever.
Every day, she’ll have mine.
JD
JD, The cloistered Carmelite nuns in Des Plaines, IL pray continuously for my family. They are having a Novena in their monastery in early March. I will ask them to include Moira in those prayers.
Beautiful piece. I'll see if I can get her on my grand nieces' prayer list. Can't do better than that!