A Letter on the Wall

A letter from a child prompts advice to an adult.

Atlanta, GA

February 12, 2026

Years ago when you were a child, you wrote me a note. In it you described your hero, and explained why he was me.

That letter hangs in a frame by my desk. I see it often, but don’t notice it enough. This morning, I re-read it. It elicited a tear, and this response.

From the day you were born you’ve made me proud. You were an adorable child who overcame obstacles to get where you are.

You’re blessed with a positive attitude, blinded to clouds by each silver lining. You never notice a half-empty glass, and always assume you’ll find something to drink.

The Moments that Matter Most

You’re now well into your twenties, the defining decade of your life. This is a time more for energy and effort than play and pleasure… to plant seeds for the future instead of stripping soil for what’s fleeting.

I know that in a world marinated in easy distractions of social media and short texts, single-minded focus is increasingly difficult. But that means if you master it, you have an edge.

Woody Allen joked that 90% of success is showing up. Over time, that quip has become a proverb. These days, most people are reluctant to get out of bed or off their phones.

If you rise at a reasonable hour, wash up, and be presentable and dependable, you’ll outshine almost everyone. By asking questions, offering ideas, arriving early, and leaving late, you’ll blow them away.

Simple as that sounds, success usually wilts under the weight of inadequate discipline. We can’t flourish by doing what’s necessary only when we feel like doing it.

One way or the other, the moments when we’re least inclined are the ones that matter most. We either reap the reward for surmounting barriers, or forgo opportunity because we succumbed to sloth.

Bigger and Further

We occasionally must act our way into doing what needs to be done. It’s sometimes necessary to feign enthusiasm to overcome indolence or apathy.

But to do so we need to know why we should bother. We must visualize where we’re going, and (most importantly) who we’ll be when we arrive.

Achievers focus on the ends; mediocrities on the means. To those who succeed, obstacles are opportunities. For those who flounder, they become excuses.

Avoid distractions, and train your attention on what matters. By that I don’t mean chasing the floozy at the bar, deciding who’s buying the next round, or wondering who’ll win next week’s game.

Think bigger… and further. If your goals for the next several years don’t inform what you do the next few months, then what you do (or don’t) the next few months will determine where you are the next few years. But you probably won’t like it when you get there.

Who We Become

Figure out who you want to be, then avoid or engage in activities as if you were already that person. Do what he’d indulge and dispense with what he’d dispatch.

Anything we do moves us closer to, or further from, the place we want to be. If you’d prefer a particular action not become a habit, then don’t do it.

This can be difficult, particularly when those around you pressure you to conform. That’s why you must place yourself among people who inspire and support you as you pursue your goals. And avoid those who languish beneath the heights you seek.

It’s said we become the average of the five people we’re with the most. As with developing skills before an emergency arises, it’s important to build nourishing relationships before you need them.

Maintain rewarding friendships and prioritize valuable experience (as opposed to cursory “experiences”). Cultivate relationships with your goals in mind. Abandon albatross acquaintances that drag you down.

Be with people who’ve gotten where you want to go, or who are determined to get there. Discover where they assemble, and find a reason to go. But bring something to the party, even if only a long list of good questions and a sincere desire to offer assistance.

Always add value. Offer to help the people you meet. To earn more, you need to learn more. Become curious. Read regularly, listen often, acquire skills, and be conversant.

In your twenties, you have the advantage of no one expecting you to know anything. Few successful people will consider your questions “dumb.” But if you fail to ask any, they won’t consider you at all.

Curate what you read, watch, and listen to. Cull detrimental debris from your mental attic. Always have a reading list, filled with informative, uplifting, and character-building books. Write regularly, be accountable, and challenge assumptions… especially your own.

Who you marry is the most important decision you’ll make. Don’t “settle” for a woman to be your wife. Set standards and preserve them, for you and for her.

Make yourself worthy of your ideal woman. Craft plans, pursue goals, acquire skills, and reveal by your appearance and actions that you can support a family, and are the man whose name she’d be honored to share.

Our Gift to God

As you move thru life, look several exits up the road, and wonder what you’d do if it never ended. As CS Lewis asked, would you act differently if you thought you’d live only eighty years than if you knew you had an eternity?

Strong societies and successful people have long horizons. Their time preference is low and their happiness high. Strive to delay gratification, and it’ll eventually arrive. Trying to grasp it too soon forces it to slip thru your fingers.

An aphorism attributed to many asserts that God’s gift to us is who we are. But our gift to Him is who we become. On His vast ocean, each of us is a small vessel, which tends to drift (or sink) without proper guidance.

As your father, it’s my honor to help you steer. If nothing else, I’ll always be the reliable oar you honored in your note.

Dad

PS - My most recent book, featuring cultural, historical, and economic observations, insights, and reflections from around the world, is out and still in stock. You can get a copy here: